Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Can you be too picky in choosing a mate?

Absolutely, and quite frankly this is where I think most people go terribly wrong and wind up in failed relationships, and ultimately, failed marriages. People tend to have some form of a checklist that they've formulated in their mind about what defines the 'perfect mate.' A gal may be looking for a guy who's a certain height and build. A guy may be looking for a busty blonde. A gal may be wanting a man who earns a specified dollar amount in salary every year, or that wears a particular title. A guy may be looking for a woman who weighs x-amount of pounds.

At the end of the day I think the person you ultimately wind up falling in love with typically turns out to be quite a bit different than what you may have thought you were looking for. Love is a funny thing. In most cases it just sort of happens. When it does, that person simply suits you in every way. It's really all about chemistry, and personality, and nothing about physical attributes. The thing about love is that when you do love someone, that person can be nothing short of beautiful to you no matter what they may look like in other people's eyes.

There's that old saying that you can never judge a book by its cover. That's as true in the case of love, and choosing a mate, as it is in finding a good read. As far as I can see it, if you can truly define your perfect mate, I think frankly you are trying too hard, not being realistic, and are unlikely to ever find what you are looking for, let alone true love.

I've said it before and I'll say it again. If beauty and earnings power and perfect attributes were the sums that made love strongest, the marriages in Hollywood would be everlasting. Hollywood marriages are far from that by leaps and bounds. Maybe the next time you say to yourself, "That person is not my type," you should stop and think about it. The person you think is your type probably isn't either.